I bit the bullet and got the job done.
Sure, I have been carrying around this guilt for the past 2 years, but what made me finally succumb was the pressure of the paperwork.
As if having been a resident of the minuscule, pointless and *wicked* state of New Hampshire wasn’t tortuous enough, it is one of only 2 states that require a bunch of extra (and notarized) paperwork in order for license holders of the state to drive a car that is part of a company’s fleet. And since driving Craig’s company car means free gas, we take it every chance we can.
I’ve had a few different state licenses in the past 16 years I’ve been legal to drive, and I can assure you that hanging out at the DMV isn’t exactly my idea of a good time. My NH license didn’t expire until 2012, but I had seen a notary public more times in the past 2 years than others do in an entire lifetime. Enough was enough; I needed to git ‘er dunn.
I set a day where Craig could watch the yahoos, gathered my 3 dozen forms of ID, and headed out.
While I could describe in painstaking detail the woman I saw who was giving her most *frightful* very best RuPaul impersonation, or regale you with a tale overheard regarding baby mamas, prison time, cutting back on pot usage and the benefits of living near a liquor store, I wouldn’t want to bore you. Just a typical visit to the DMV, right?
As you know, the DMV takes all kinds. Anyone from the young teen eager to take the behind-the-wheel portion of her driving exam, to the retiree who has been driving more years than I’ve been alive; they all pass through the doors of the DMV.
During the 2 hours of my life I wasted in line, I was reminded of my grandfather. He lived past the age of 90, and I believe he actually was still driving when he became an official nonagenarian. In case you are wondering, insurance rates do not keep going up, and yes, you have to take regular road tests during those golden years.
One of the last times my grandpa visited a DMV, he described his behind-the-wheel tester as “an old guy.” Yes, my 90 year old grandfather described someone else as old. Kinda makes you wonder about our states’ employees, doesn’t it?
Anyway, I survived yet another DMV visit and am once again a full-fledged citizen of the State of Tennessee. And in case any of you are considering a “round trip relocation” a la Liz, you’ll be interested to know that the DMV stores your old license photo, and reassigns you your old license number.
URGH – my license is up in December. I’m just totally dreading it.
The nearest DMV here is located inside of a mall, which is strange, but the worst part is that it’s directly across from the mall’s play area. On Saturday’s, the line for the DMV is out the DMV door and all along the side of the play area. It’s as if they sat around and tried to come up with ways to make going there even worse!
I know no one is thinking, “Let’s stand on line for two hours and listen to the screaming children! It’ll be fun!”
DMV is equivalent to the pits of hell. I know every state is tortureous in it’s own right, but ours seems to be even more special.
I really should write a post about the hell that was my ENTIRE Friday spent trying to renew it. Turns out, I had to prove my identiy to the only state I’ve ever had a license in. Who knew.
NJ has a point system for ID validation. Too dumb to explain: (http://www.state.nj.us/mvc/Licenses/6PointID.htm) When my wallet was stolen I had a bitch of a time replacing my license because my passport (1 of the ID golden tickets) was amended for the name change from former married back to maiden, then to married which is hyphenated. The state dept updated it that way vs reissue. NJ wouldn’t accept it. Then they wouldn’t accept the police report because the Sanibel FL cop had not dated it when signing it. I got a tad upset (some may say unhinged) confronting their entire desk staff of 10 on the discrepancy that while the FBI cleared me for a children’s transport Visa, the state department was A-OK w/it, and the Russian Federation allowed me to take two of their former minor citizens to the United State FOR LIFE with that ID, NJ was not going to let me renew a license!??! I was is “rare form” as my mother says. A supervisor relented after calling Trenton provided I had birth certificate, marriage #1license, marriage #1 div decree w/name restoration, marriage #2 license. They live to make drivers lives miserable!!!
I totally agree with you on how awful the DMV is. I once overheard a lady at the DMV explain how a squirrel set her house on fire. So strange!
So as an added bonus the state of WA has closed numerous DMVs. Because of budgets, blahblahblah but actually it’s to drive the citizens insane. Because now not only do we get to drive farther to a DMV but it’s jam packed and of course not all the windows are ever open. I have been driving for about 25 years and the parking lot? scares the beejeezus out of me.
And also not a place for teenagers who have the patience of a gnat and are waiting to take the test. I suggest sending Craig with the girls when the time comes.
I had to go through this when I moved to San Diego for a second time, and I was so pumped to see they let me keep my old photo (it was a good one!)
Trips to the DMV are the worst! Glad you survived!
There is a special station in Hell, and it’s located at the DMV. I am sure of it. I have never been able to figure out how the dredges of a 30-mile square radius around my home, their kin, and a few people who are apparently bussed in from the prison can ALL be at the DMV on the same afternoon that I need to be there.
And yeah, I will be there again soon for my son’s behing-the-wheel test. Ugh. Because, of course, it’s illegal for him to drive himself there. Don’t think I didn’t consider that….
Good for you for getting that off your To Do list!
Ugh, I loathe the DMV! I have to renew my driver’s license in June and I’m already dreading it, but in California you can make an appointment and that at least cuts down most of the waiting time.
Haha! This is hilarious. I am dreading the day I have to go back to one of those…
PS your grandpa was driving at 90+?
Eh, that reminds me that I have to go back after we smog the jalopy. And then again in February when we (finally) get a new car. It is definitely my version of hell. And I’ll happily keep my old picture and my old pre-baby weight. ; )
Meanwhile in Nevada…when my husband to be and I went down to the old courthouse to get hitched I had forgotten any form of ID, no problemo they asked us if we were related (not,obviously) and then married us off! Cuh-razy!
This is my first time to your blog. The letters DMV and NH caught my eye. I hung on to my NH license for a couple of years after I moved back to UT so I could avoid the DMV too. I was just there the other day with three of my young children. Always good times.
Thanks for the laugh.
Fresh out of college, my husband and I were looking for a new adventure. We packed up the U-Haul and moved to NH. We lived in Gonic (sounds like a STD but it’s actually near Rochester) for three years.
The DMV unfortunately in a necessary evil on our lives. I hate it too. Everything just takes way longer then it really should. Is there ever a good time to go, I just don’t think so.
My old photo is better than my new one. The one I got when I moved to South Carolina is terrible.
Glad it went well!
They should require that all the workers in the DMV take some atvian coupled with a cup of sunshine before they are allowed to serve the public. For realz. They even hate being there and it’s their job.
In Canada we have to take 3 different tests before you can actually legally drive on your own. It’s a money grab.
PS. Did you get the herp while you were waiting for 2 hours? You might want to get tested.
Surviving the DMV is pretty much an urban legend around here. Seriously. I do whatever I can to NOT have to go in. And really I don’t hate the DMV but with 4 kids in tow on any given day I’m pretty sure I’d cause a meltdown of epic proportions for anyone in the building. I shudder to think of it.
I’ll be there next year, the DMV that is, not Tennessee!
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I find it so amazing that though the DMV sucking a fat one in every. single. state seems to be a recurring theme, the DMV never does anything to change its suckiness. I’m glad you survived. The last time I went, I saw 3 mullets, all in a row (though they all had varying degrees of nastiness). I thought I was going to die of shock.
My father, on the other hand, refers to anyone who’s even a few months younger than him as a “kid”. Some of those kids are grandparents.
This is one of the many reasons I’m happy to stay put in PA! I’m in and out of the DMV in less than 30 minutes at license renewal time.
This is why I’m partly glad we can pay ‘agents’ to have our license here but then on the other hand, that’s why we got so many people who doesn’t belong on the street driving like a maniac here
Just had the “pleasure” of visiting my local DMV. I was more worried about my picture than hanging out there though. I also posted about my DMV experience. I enjoyed people watching. It kept me entertained for 2 hours.
I feel for you, dear. The Tennessee DMV is the worst. And as a lifelong Tennessean I can say that.
When I lived in the UK, my purse was stolen.
Imagine the joy of trying to get your driver’s license replaced when you are living 3000, 7 time zones and several international borders away.
Not so much about the fun, that.
Ugh.
HE-double hockey sticks. That is what I think of the DMV.
Wow, old photo, huh? That’s scary. Last time I had my pic taken for a driver’s license, it was on a whim that I even stopped and I had forgotten that I was sans make-up with my hair in a scraggly ponytail. Love showing that picture to everyone who asks for ID.
The DMV in WV was ridiculous. They needed two proofs of residency for me to change my name on my license, and the current license wasn’t one of them. And considering I had NOTHING in my married name at the time, it was almost impossible. So then we moved to FL and expected the same and they were all, “what’s your social? Ok, take your picture, you’re good to go.” Easiest EVER. And yes, there are all kinds of interesting people there, huh?
Sounds like quite the trip!! At least you can look back on it and laugh. haha
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The DMV is no place for anybody!! How can one place be busy all of the time? It makes no sense. Few things in life are as frustrating as spending hours at the DMV.
Hate the DMV and you know I use that word sparingly…so yeah, I hate it!
You described it perfectly and it seems DMVs across the United States don’t really differ that much at all! Go figure.
Congratulations. Truly my driver’s license photo is a picture of terror mainly because of the running conversation the woman behind me was still having as they took my photo. Something about she was able to keep her license off of suspension thanks to the sexual favors she hands out to the policemen who pull her over. She told me I might want to give it a try.
I’m pretty sure a visit to the DMV is akin to a county jail prison visit.
I have 14 more months until I have to run the DMV gauntlet again. I should probably get in line now.
I really like my current picture… hope they let me keep it. As I’m sure I haven’t aged at all in the last decade, that picture is still completely accurate. {Perhaps my eyesight is failing a bit, though?!}
I absolutely hate the DMV – I spent hours in there earlier this year after I lost my DL only to realize there was no way I’d get seen before they closed that day, and they were STILL handing out new tickets when I left.
The DMV. I had to post about it’s sheer ridiculousness once, too.
Oh, how I hate getting a new license! So very much.
I won’t admit that we’ve been in NC for almost a year and I still have my PA license. B/c that would be wrong.
The last time I had to renew, I was forced to take all my children with me.
Need I say more?
I think not.
Once upon a time I spent six -yes, 6! – hours at the DMV when I moved from Canada to California and had to take a driver’s test and stand in one line after the other. Now, you can make appointments in CA so it’s much faster. Miserable places all the way around. Good for you for biting the bullet and getting it done!
The DMV is just plain scary here where we live, which is why two years after moving, I still haven’t gone in for a change of address and new license! Funny explaining when asked to see our cards, why the hubs and I reside at different addresses!
You know, say what you will about NH, but I have lived in three different states at various times in my life and have had to get different licenses switched out and register my car and blah, blah, blah.
While the most expensive of the three, NH was the least painful. No lines. Yes, you read that correctly. I have never spent a minute in a line getting my license or my registration.
Compare that to a 3 hour wait in PA or the asshats in MA who told me that despite the fact that I had purchased my car in PA, and paid PA sales tax, I owed the lovely state of Taxachusettes 5 additional percent. After waiting in line for 2 hours.
While I felt raped and pillaged by NH fees, it was done quickly and for that, I applaud them.
Oh my God I *hate* the DMV. I will do anything to avoid it. I still use the same picture on my license from over 15 years ago and I have avoided filing a dba form for one of my businesses for 4 years because my one attempt to file it 4 years ago resulted in a huge hassle, and atitiude and bs. So I gotta bit the bullet one of these days too
I had a CA license while working for a NH marketing company and driving their cars. I did it illegally. They are no longer in business.
I also picked up wicked while I was there and now use it instead of Hella. Of course, no one really says hella anymore here, but whatevs.
Ah the DMV. It’s almost as much fun people watching there as it is in Vegas.
It has always fascinated me that no matter what state you live in, the DMV is always one of the most terrifying places you can end up. Luckily, we have one of those express deals where you can get in and out pretty quickly, but the people there still rival any of the best ones you would ever encounter in a WalMart.
I am so sorry for you dear one!! I luckily, was able to renew my license by mail this time!! Crazy huh!
The DMV is hands-down my least favorite place in the world (well, it ties with a visit to the dentist’s office. I honestly don’t know which is worse). I’m just glad I got it over with and don’t have to return for awhile (and am thankful that I can change my address ONLINE! WOOHOO!).
In MA? They stopped reminding you to renew your license. So there I was last year, 2 months after my birthday driving my kids around with an expired license. Know how I found out? The guy at the packy told me – you’re old enough to buy this wine, but your license is expired. The SHAME! I mean, I don’t even LOOK a day over 21!
Going to the DMV is on my list of the worst possible things to do. UGH!